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| Man it has been fucking forever. Lots have changed. High school's done. That long 4 year era of life changing events / hell is over. All the people I have met all of these years, all the friends I thought I had, are all gone. 237520857 girls got pregnant, and some people dropped off the face of the earth. I don't think i took one positive thing from high school other then some education that stood out to me. With the exception of a few, not of of you people i graduated with meant anything to me. I'll see you all in 10 years.
I didn't mean for that to come out negative.
The guy I have had a crush on since feb is still the current one :) I'm more crazy about that guy then ever. Things are going really slow and that's just how it has to be right now. I'm ok with that. I tried dating here and there and it didn't get me anywhere. Almost, but nothing real.
Still at circuit city. Lots of mixed feelings about that place. I notice myself just keep excelling in that job and all i'm really doing it for is to have more leverage and possibly earn more money there. My plan is to get another job that will quote me like 15 dollars an hour, which i think country wide can do, and i want to just apply and get a writin statement that I can be hired there at like 15 an hour, show CC, and hope they match it. If not, then I guess I'm out. I don't really have a strong connection with that place so much. Lots of people are flaky there. No one can really be trusted, or show true friendship. It's so easy how they forget about you sometimes. But i'm just going with the flow. I know shit is not permanent there. Oh well. It'll work itself out. I asked for a rise and I don't think I'm going to get it, but we'll see.
College starts in a few weeks. I'm pretty nervous. I don't really have anything to be nervous about though. it's just like grade 13. I just want to get there a few days before class starts and find where all my classes are and make sure i know where I'm going. I'm not going to be late to classes n shit. I want to know exactly where I'm going. I'll have kyle help me haha.
Guitar is kind of frustrating me. It's because I didn't play for about a week. I'm really rusty. When I'm in a lesson, shit makes sense and he knows what he's talking about but when I get home and try to do it, I'm just fucking terrible. I feel like I'm not learning enough. I know I have to put more work into it first before I talk to him about this because I know I can work harder. I go out and get drunk more then I should practice. I am starting to feel that lack of motivation to play because it keeps kicking my ass. tracy would hate to hear me say that so i'm not gunna let it get to that point. I just really need to get my priorities in order. School, work, guitar. That's what I have to make my life. I want to be a good guitar player and I want to be able to look at the board and know exaclt what i'm doing. I long for that. I was at that point with piano and I lost it but I know I can be like that again. I just have to work hard and it's going to take time.
Car's in the shop getting a body kit right now. I have to have it back before monday becaus ei have no way of getting to work n shit. Soi have to call them... Like now, and my m om has to come home soon to take me to work. I'm out.
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| Ah, so lots have been going on. Life is getting more and more adventurous everyday. So many awesome opportunities.
Work has been going good. I'm currently trying to get promoted. I think it's working but we will see. I'm leading my department in numbers. HA! I don't know how I did it but I am.
School is also going good. I missed 2 out of 5 days of school already, haha. On Thursday I didn't get off work till 5am, because we had a huge inventory night. It was nuts. And on Tuesday, I just had the hardest time waking up because I was still in "winter break" mode.
I still love my car. I got a stereo installed in there by my work. it makes my speakers sound so much better but I'm still going to replace them to make them sound better. Next paycheck I'm also going to order my new license plate off of the Arizona Government site. I don't want to say what it is yet so I know I'll get it. Haha, it's awesome though.
My brother turned 19 yesterday. Man how time is flying. I'm 18 in less then 3 months. My dad's birthday is very soon too. Sometime this month.
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Friends are doing awesome. There's lots of them. I'm making more at work too. We all like to drink over there so you can imagine how we like to party. Hahaha awesome
Anyway, I'm gunna eat some food real quick and then going out. Maybe play some beer pong again tonight. I've been playing that alot lately. And it's a school night too! Haha how wild am I. Later
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| Man can you believe that the same day I wrote that last blog, I got into a car accident with the car I was so happy about? Yea it's fucking stupid. There's hardly any damage though.. I just need a new bumper. Whatever. I'm embarrassed. Anyway.
Work is starting to slow down. Store hours I am doing 2-9 today.
There is nothing else really exciting going on right now, really. Slayer is coming to Tucson WHICH I AM GOING TO!! Maybe even get lucky with some shit with that concert too :) I don't wanna say anything right now but if it works, you know I'll say.
gUyyyuuyYyssS. I've been hangin around 1 inparticular and I kinda like where it's going. It's nothing exclusive though. I kinda want it that way. But things are goin pretty cool with it and it all revolves pretty well with the friends I've been hanging around a lot too.
New years eve was REALLY fun. Big party at Ariels house. If you're into beer, hard a, pot and lesbian action, and guitar playing this party was for you. Nuff said. (it's amazing what alcohol does to some girls.)
Ummmmmmm still not living at the house. We are staying at appartments. I fucking miss my house. It seems like we'll never live back home. I want everthing to go back to normal NOW! The fucking people are taking their time fixing our house and cleaning it and putting everything back together. There is never anyone there doing anything. I visit the house weekly. Oh well...
MONEY! After paying all my bills, I have NONE! Haha. I remember seeing over a grand in my account a few days ago, now I'm at about 105. That's after car payment, insurence payment, phone payment, gay money abd still paying off my accident. I have to make 105 last me till the 12th :( dang.
Anyway, I'm going to go get ready for work. yay. That's all I do anymore. School is starting soon.. Shit.. I'M GRADUATING THIS YEAR!!!AHHHHH!!!!
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| I'm in class right now while people are doing their presentation for my advanced marketing class. I did mine yesterday. I took my english final today, and i have my honors advanced accounting class next. I'm just kinda bored so i figured i'd write my thoughts hah My car is the best thing ever. I'm so lucky to have it. I never thought I'd ever drive again. I don't know how the whole thing came about after all this time but i'm so glad it did and i think my celica gt is so sick. Everyone at work loves it. I still have to take pictures of it. My living siutation has been really fucked up for a long time since my place had a fire oct 21. We were living in a hotel for the longest time then relocated to appartments. They are telling us that it will be even months form now till we are back home. Everything at home is a mess and the garage is destroyed. It's depressing. Anyway. Work/money - Lots of work = lots of money :) i'd diggin my 700$ pay checks right now. For the money an hour I make and the hours I work I think it's worth it. But for how HARD i work, I'm definately trying to get promoted. I'm busting my ass and my managers know. I'm really excited but I am trying to speed up the process. The job has alot more responsibility. Sometimes while i'm in the mix eof everything, i wonder if i can even do it. You have to be the one everyone goes to for an answer, AND have to maintain the department's numbers. Being a Senior at Circuit City would be like a step below management. I don't know. All I gotta do is show leadership and bist my ass with sales. Which i'm completely doing. Friends - God damn how things keep changing. What has happened to everyone? It's so fuckin crazy how things are soooo soooo different from last year. People that i basically grew up with are all scattered, and all on such different paths. Some have fucked themselves and others have bettered. When ALL of us were in HS, everything was so much easier, everyone was in the same place and we all hung out every night and did the same awesome shit and spent so much time together. Now some people moved out, others driffered off and went to college, some have different issues... I hardly see anyone i used to hang out with anymore. Some are still coming around again. I miss then alot. Yea my explinations are really vegue but i don't feel like spilling other people's business. Relationships have ended between people too. Shocking a little if you ask me. It's kinda crazy how betrayal and friendship go hand in hand now. Boys? - Yea right. This subject never seems to work out very much. My friend once asked me a question and said "have you brought anyone in the last year that's been amazing?" And at the time i said no. But i can think of like.. 2 that i really liked. But I don't know wtf is goin on. There always seems to be someone there. Someone interested in me but who cares? At this age, girls can always get attention like that. And it's nothing because i'm the tomboy. I'm waiting for someone who makes me gasp when i see them. I'm tired of settling for less. And also hiding... I want to show someone off to the world that I really like too. I never fuly had that feeling since Matt. My long time readers know that. I spent every waking moment with him haha. I'm looking for something like that again but more mature. Back then, we had no responsibility. I guess it's different now. Maybe i can't have that lala feeling again because we're growing up. But i loved it while i had it. But still. COME ON NOW. I'll add more later. | | |
| SO I BOUGHT A CAR!! It's a toyota celica gt 03. FUCK YEA!! Let's not crash this one now shall we?? I'm trying to get promoted at work and I think it's working!! Ohhhh boys boys boys... And deadstock megadeth vintage shirts. I definately collect. Still not living at home. Since oct. 21. Sister is 16 now. Christmas is coming!! I'm getting a laptop i know that!! WOOOO | | |
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